I dare you to catch razor butterflies

Writing One's Heart

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

I've reached a juncture in my life where i appear despondent about my surroundings and my future. Yes I appear such, but feel of it, not. It's rather hard to express my heart and blood in words. These words would not bleed the same way i would. It would not smile in moments of strife, but it would remind me to do so. My words would serve as landmarks to those in need of direction. It would navigate the lost and those wanting to be lost.

When we cut ourselves, we are united in knowing that the world is made up of vessels, carrying wine of the richest hues of red. But, wouldn't it be naive to be oblivious to the fact that each of us desire for a degree of exclusiveness within ? Where does this feeling come from, the feeling to be differentiated and specialised, yet seeking integration of a scale so large, that it is all we see in the world. The need to be different yet still being able to belong to a denomination of nature and it's society. When the stars stop flickering and the lions cease to pride, would we still be left with the names our fathers gave birth to ?

As a human being, I can't promise much. I'm susceptible to human folly and perceptions. We all try to be Gods of our own universe, yes we all try to do so. Those who succeed, tend to denounce blessings while those who fail, beg for them. I can no longer look at the world in awe and amazement. My eyes must measure and deduce. My heart no longer listens to the birds chirp, rather the music of economies and acceptance. My lips no longer whisper poetry, but mutter hate and love all the same. Finding one's heart requires one to lose it in the first place. Mine was never lost, it was always beating in my ears and veins. My feelings are returning. I'm starting to realise, that it's okay to be confused and it's okay to be alone.

There are times when i feel the need to dissociate myself from your lies and even your company. And then i remember.

caught a razor butterfly at - 12:36 AM |